Life and Love post Divorce - Everything YOU wanted to know (Q&A)

Life and Love post Divorce - Everything YOU wanted to know (Q&A)

Life and Love post Divorce - Everything YOU wanted to know (Q&A)

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I hope this isn’t going to be a theme with #GADG…

I can’t seem to stick to my timeline for blog post release dates…

I keep changing the title and content of the ‘next ‘diary entry…. Fok.

 

It’s so hard to blog in ‘real time’, probably why people don’t do it (Silly Cath xD)

 

The truth is… My perspective and emotions are constantly changing… What I write today I may feel differently about tomorrow. 

 

I guess that’s human nature though - right? So I shouldn’t be so ‘paranoid’ but having said that…

 

 I truly want this blog to be valuable, not just some online rant of superfluous CRAP. 

 

So please bear with me when I ‘delay’ release dates… Dankie.

 

So what’s news with Cath? 

 

Lots actually… The response to #GADG has been INCREDIBLE! (and Thank YOU!) 

…So much so that its pushed me into kicking things up a notch and developing an APP. 

Still in its infancy stages but I’m pretty confident its going to be a ‘first-of-its-kind’ and extremely valuable to those who invest BUT I’ll share more about it when there’s a solid wireframe in place! No point in getting ahead of myself just yet…

 

How’s your daughter?

 

She’s good. Been with her dad for an ‘extended’ period of time. Living between Durban and East London has been rather challenging so we agreed to try keep her based majority in Durban where she can remain in ‘school routine’. That and the mere fact that cost of flights between Durban and East London are exorbitant! 

 

Co-parenting, shared parenting SUCKS! 

 

I’m so desperate to try find a solution to creating a ‘stable’ and ‘consistent’ environment for Ribs but it’s so fokken challenging when she’s obligated to living in two homes. 

 

By the way… I’m not entirely sold on this idea of “co-parenting”, 50/50 custody split (something the courts currently favour). 

 

I don’t know how a child is supposed to grow up having a solid foundation/understanding of morals and values, routine and structure when she lives between two people who literally live opposite lives and agree on NOTHING. 

 

I’m sure a lot of you want to jump to your keyboard and say something to the effect of “you need to put your difference aside for the sake of the child” which is completely valid but not easy when you’re dealing with two stubborn ass donkeys. 

 

So Cath… have you started dating?

 

Hmmm… Not exactly. I’ve met a handful of interesting individuals who have sparked my interest, one in particular who seems to be sticking around but nothing serious at the moment. 

 

There’s a slight underlying fear of getting hurt AGAIN. Ok, maybe a little more than ‘slight’ – but I’m going to try remain in the positive lane.

 

Do you think you’ll ever get remarried?

 

I love the idea of falling in love again… 

Getting remarried… 

Adding to the family... 

 

I truly want the opportunity to build a marriage that’s NOT based on a foundation of lies and deceit. I refuse to make that mistake twice! 

 

Don’t you think it’s too soon to be thinking about love and marriage?

 

Hmmmm... Nope. 

 

Something that HAS’NT changed about me (and never will) is that I’m a ‘committed’ individual. 

 

I DO NOT fancy the idea of being that divorcee’ chick who sleeps around and changes her relationship status as frequently as her underwear. 

 

If I commit to a relationship I’m most likely investing long term. That doesn't mean I’m on a hunt to lock down the next individual to put a ring on my finger – I’m not and don’t need the ‘security’ of marriage but it does mean that I take that person seriously and will be giving them my 110%. I’m just not that kinda girl who can ‘juggle chat’ or #Tinder multiple men.

 

Believe me - I tried! Having 10 different ‘interested’ men talk to me on Tinder was quite… ummmm… well… unsettling? but I’ll write a separate blog post on THAT experience at a later stage. It’s quite funny. xD

 

So you’re ‘down’ for love then?

 

The bottom line is… 

 

Life is short, tomorrow isn’t guaranteed and I’d personally much prefer to play the odds at finding real love and not messing around than never to have loved at all.  

 

I’m not actively seeking it, right now I’m still pro putting MYSELF and MY life first. The right person will come along and just fall into place and they’ll feel the same way about me.

 

So that rounds up todays blog post… A little update on me, hopefully not an anti-climax xD 

 

If you have any questions, please feel free to comment below. 

 

My life is an open book and I’m happy to share any parts of my story if it’s helping somebody get through a shitty situation.

 

There is so much reward to reap in NEVER GIVING UP, MOVING FORWARD and REMAINING POSTITIVE. Something my fisherman friend constantly reminds me about (See Diary Entry #3 to learn more about the fisherman)

 

Divorce isn’t pretty gurl… but one things for certain is that there is ALWAYS light at the end of the tunnel. 

 

Don’t stress about being alone for FOREVEERRRR… You’ll meet someone one day – PROMSISE! He’s gonna love you ‘post-divorce flaws’ and all!

 

Just keep working on YOH-SELF and EMBRACE the journey of  picking your shit up and MOVING ON!!! (Let that be the fire cracker up your ass today xD)

 

Chow for now!

 

Cath 

x

 

Following the Bean is a two-part team consisting of 1 x superhero Mom and 1 x model-extraordinaire Bean. Mom (aka Catherine Basson), a professional photographer by day and Bean-blogger by night has 3 years of fashion-knowledge sneakily tucked under her belt while Bean (aka Rebecca Aaliyah Alexander Basson) is a part time baby and full time model.